CATALYST NEWS

Eva Dahm, CPCC, MA

October, 2003

Dedicated to your growth and exploration.

LIVING IN OVERWHELM

It is a badge of honor these days to be so busy you can't think. Is that your situation? How does that energy of overwhelm feel in your body? Like a miniature tornado? Tight and tense? Red hot?

Many of my clients report feeling overwhelmed. What does "overwhelm" mean? I believe the meaning is unique to the individual. Your level might not be the same as mine. Much like a pain threshold. More important is where do we go for relief.

COMMITMENTS

Obviously, we can review activities that our family members or we have said yes to. What commitment needs to be changed to a no? Did you agree to an on-going group awhile ago that no longer interests you? Are you doing something out of a feeling of obligation rather than because you chose it?

Do you always say yes when asked to help? Here's a skill to develop-saying no thank you. If you need to practice when it doesn't matter-want more coffee or need to get stamps today? Good chances to use your new word! Also recall how overwhelm feels when someone asks for you to do one more thing. Bring the feeling to mind gives you the added impetus to say "Thank you, but no."

Are you caught off guard when asked to lend a hand? Practice asking for time to think about it. I usually ask if I can sleep on the idea before I decide. Overnight I get all sorts of insights into the best answer.

If your family is crazed, perhaps choosing for more family togetherness time is needed. I have a friend whose three children are allowed only one extra curricular activity per child. Her family, as a result, has more time to be together. And the focus her children have on the one activity increases their skills.

WATCH YOUR ENERGY

Another way to look at feeling too busy is to examine what negatively impacts your energy? What sounds in the environment drain you or interfere with your peace? I am very sensitive to the music lead-in to the news shows. The music reminds me of the chase scene or scary scene in a movie. It produces tension and a faster heart beat. Do I need that in my home or bedroom before sleep? I think not. What is your body reaction to news music? (To say nothing about the news content of fear and your body reaction to that day after day!)

Then consider the news or advertising images flashing across the screen at breakneck speed. Since MTV videos and video games taught us to appreciate fast changing images, movies and television programs have adopted them. I also feel a faster heart beat with the pacing they use. I do not usually choose to experience these images. What are your body sensations when you watch cascading images?

BE PRESENT

One contribution to overwhelm is not ever being present. We arrive somewhere from a meeting or work and our mind travels back to home or the drive or travels forward to the next meeting or the weekend. Getting grounded and present in the moment helps to calm your mind and assists you to remember that your body can usually do only one (and at the most two) things at once. Being grounded and focused on where you are now and what you are doing helps you to slow down and be present. Then your days become one focused experience after the other rather than a blur. Take a moment to breathe deeply three times and get present now.

ON THE ROADS

One place where energy may go into overload is driving on the tollways. Pressures to speed, to cut the drive time down, and to beat the other car create tight shoulders and neck. What is your energy on the road? Can you maintain any calm?

A friend recently drove to her appointments for an entire week on the back roads. She noticed and appreciated nature more. She also slowed down and enjoyed the drives-getting present. How can you shift your driving routines to open space for seeing our world?

CALM CENTERED CORE

What are the results of all this noticing? For one thing, awareness means you have a choice to change what you do and what stimulates you. Also what we pay attention to changes just because of our attention. (Heisenberg Principle)

My meditation time, yoga and frequent breathing breaks have created a calm, solid core in me. This calm center allows some level of chaos to surround me without changing the core.

Ready for an example of what I mean? At church one day before I even got in the door I was asked to organize a seven-week home study program. Even though my instinct was to say, "No, I'm too busy," my calm inner self was saying yes, yes, yes. I slept on it and agreed. I valued giving back to the community more than identifying with the crazed and overly busy feeling.

Two weeks ago my business partner called to say she was too sick to do a one-hour virtual class that afternoon. Before we were done talking about it, she asked me to lead the class. My scared, limiting self wanted to say, "No, way! Teach my very first virtual class with no preparation!" However, I heard my calm higher self say "Sure!" (The class went well and afterwards I was not crazy with self-criticism!) What might you be able to say an openhearted yes to from a more grounded and centered self?

So take a look at both your commitments and your energy level when you are feeling too busy. Take a moment to breathe and ground yourself. Imagine tree roots going from your feet down into the earth. (Link here to "Running Energy Meditation" on Pathways To Radiance web site for an example.) Turn off the news. Change your routine and notice the beautiful trees. Maybe mental clarity is more of what you need than anything.

Love and light, eva